Two Year Checkup

Taking advantage of the health insurance that we never can access due to our living out of the country, we took Kaia to a pediatrician while staying with my family in California. I wont get into a compare and contrast with an earlier post, but it certainly made for some humorous moments. Consider this exchange with a young (probably a few years out of med school), energetic doctor at this clinic with my thoughts in parenthesis:

Doctor: (reading from a checklist)

“So, usually at the two year checkup we like to tell parents about playground safety because the children become more active at this age. First of all, you will want to make sure that the playground structures are in good condition and sturdy (how about rusted, with razor sharp edges and falling apart?).”

“Lots of the newer playground have switched from sand to a more foam base, which is much safer for children, if they are to fall (what about sand that looks like a litter box for cats, dogs and people alike?).”

“Sometimes older children can be a bit aggressive on the play structures, so you’ll want to keep an eye out for that (what about packs of wild dogs?)”

“Also, we want to tell you a bit about West Nile virus—they have found a few cases in animals, in the far northern part of the region—and so you will want to make sure that you keep him covered up at dusk and with ample mosquito repellant. It hasn’t shown up in humans, but you want to be on the safe side (hmm…so what do you think about dengue fever, Japanese encephalitis, yellow fever, oh, and malaria?)

“So, let’s see, do you have your son’s vaccination card? OK, so let’s see…(long pause)…OK, he’s got…”

Indiapapa: Well, we’ll be getting the final shot of the Hepatitis B vaccination in a few months. We actually live in India, doctor.

Doctor: Oh. OK. (long pause). So I guess you’ve got it covered (hey, this isn’t in the script!?!)

Why I Love this Time: Band-aid obsessions.